Monday Day Date

Every Monday when my love was here, we would have a Monday day date.

Our first one wasn't really suppose to be a date. We were not in a good place in our relationship. In fact, we had recently decided to go our separate ways. He just came back from spending most of the year in a different country. We were going to meet at my favorite store in the mall, which is already romantic on its own, but meeting there was even more so.

We had a awkwardly great time that day and it started a little something.

We got back together.

And we continued having Monday day dates while he was here. I loved them. When every one else was working or doing usual Monday things we were on a date. It brought us closer. It was so special to me.

He left to go on another adventure in a far away land now. Sad face.

Monday's make me miss him a little more but every Monday that passes I know that he is closer to coming home to me.

Inspiration List

A list of inspirational things, one thing for each letter of the alphabet

• Anyone who can find the silver lining in a tough situation
• Bible verses that shake you to your soul
• Children doing anything with childlike wonder
• Daydreaming
• Emotions. Mine and others.
• Falling in love
• Gage inspires me to be a better person not only for me but for him
• The happiness in other people
• Imagining the world being a better place
• Joy. In anything and everything
• Keys. They are a reminder that there always ways to unlock close doors
• Libraries filled with so many books that I will never be able to read them all
• Marshall, my love. I can't even put in to words how this man inspires me.
• Nature
• Ordinary people doing extraordinary things
• Photography. Both taking photos and looking at them.
• Quotations from authors both known and unknown
•  Road trips with just me, myself and the radio
• Sunrises and sunsets. So grand that they inspire almost every one
• The tenderness in other people
• Uniting together
• Veterans who fight/fought bravely for my country
• Watching Gage overcome anything his disease throws at him
• Xenodochial. It mean being friendly to strangers and being intuitive or easy to understand
• Yearning for more
• Zest for life

*This is my first completed goal of my 101 goals!

My Night With Marilyn

I spent the evening with Marilyn Monroe on Friday. It was an amazing way to start the weekend off. She was an extremely sexy but somewhat innocent-like date. She played many roles through out the night...

As she played each character in the three movies I watched!

I had a little Marilyn Monroe movie marathon going on. It wasn't really intentional. I watched the first one and thought 'why not?' and I kept going. It was great. Before this I have only seen 1 of her movies. I enjoyed watching her quite a bit. I'm definitely still an Audrey gal but I have a lot of new found love for Marilyn.

I watched How To Marry A Millionaire, Monkey Business, and River Of No Return.

How To Marry A Millionaire was definitely my favorite. She was adorable in it and the story was wonderful.

I don't have any big plans for the rest of the weekend so I might keep the Marilyn marathon going.

Daydreamin'

As soon as the song came on over my radio in the car I started daydreaming. My mind flashed to a scene where we were dancing together to this song and everyone was watching us. We didn't even notice the people. We were holding each other so close and just staring into each others eyes. I started singing the song in a soft whisper to you and you started singing it back to me. It was a beautiful moment between two people. A moment that I didn't want to end but driving while daydreaming could be a dangerous thing.

I hope that one day we can dance to that song in person just as we did in my daydream.
I'm sure it would be even more beautiful of a moment.

About Me

I'm Meagan. 

I use to go by Meg. Maybe I still do. You can call me anything as long as it is nice!

I call Tennessee home but currently living in Kentucky. I've had a few detours along the way.

I'm a mom to a wonderful little boy. He is the light of my life.

I'm a single(but currently taken) mommy. I've been a single mom since my son was a little babe.

I'm a lover of books, of writing, the color brown, the midnight hour, of lists, of road trips, fashion, the store Anthropologie, making people beautiful, of photography, and anything pumpkin flavored.

I'm a pretty happy person. I usually always have a smile on my face.

2 Goals And A Baby

There is no baby despite the title of this post. I just thought it was catchy. 2 men and a baby. 2 goals and a baby. Get it? Ok. Maybe not. On to the goals!

I read The Spectacular Now earlier this year. It was a pretty good book. It was one of the first books I read on my iPad after swearing I would only ever read paper books. Now I find myself rarely buying paper books.

I watched the movie yesterday. I'm having a lot of fun with the goal of watching a movie for every letter in the alphabet. I'm not going to count the The. So, my movie was an S.

The Spectacular Now is just sad. Not sad in a bad way. Sad in a sad way. Through out the movie and book, I didn't know if I liked the main character, Sutter Keely. He was frustrating. I realized, though, that he is just trying to figure out the world and making mistakes along the way like the rest of us. Not a hugger but he needed a hug. If only I could reach through a book or screen.

Speaking of rarely buying paper books, while Christmas shopping I picked up one. It was The Book Thief. It took me a minute to get into the book but once I did I couldn't put it down and blazed through in no time. I'm really excited to see the movie now. I'm also excited that I am starting another goal on the list and that is reading my height in books. A couple inches down and only about 5 feet and 3 inches to go!

I'm Not A Hugger

When you meet people you know right away if someone is a hugger or not. The hugger will always, without hesitation, reach in for a hug. They don't even have to know you. It just comes natural to them.

Hugs can be a good thing. They provide comfort and love. It can be a wonderful way to show affection.

I am, however, not a hugger. Hugging is awkward for me. Is it invading personal space? You are definitely invading mine. Am I hugging right? Too long? Too short? I might be the only person who worries about those things. I don't know. My parents weren't really huggers, either. I'll just throw the blame on them like any good kid would do...Unlike them I will hug my child all day every day if I could! He is my exception. Well, I will hug most kids. I think my hugging anxiety is more geared toward adults.

I went to a little family get together for the holidays today. As we were all about to get into the cars the hugging started. We just really aren't the hugging type of people or maybe it is just me. I don't know. I guess looking back they all seemed fine with hugging.

Hug for you. Hug for her. Hug for him...

I hugged my brother goodbye.

It dawned on me 20 or so minutes later in the car that I don't think I've ever hugged my brother before tonight.

Weird.

It was weird hugging him but even weirder knowing that I had never done that before.

I'm not a hugger but I think I'm going to hug a little more now. Especially my family.

The 50 Questions&A Convo

The 50 questions that will free your mind is on my goal list. This is the conversation I had with my love about some of the questions. 

The questions are red.
He is bold.
I'm normal.
-----------

How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?

22

Why?

I took a quiz that's going around Facebook and it told me I was 16. It's a dumb quiz.

haha

How old would you be?

I was going to say a little older at first.
But I don't know.
People always say I look younger (lately).
So maybe I'm just the right age for my age.

Yeah. I think your age fits you

Which is worse, failing or never trying?

Haha.I was like why is he asking me these questions. Then I realized it's the 50 questions.

haha

Which is worse failing or never trying?I think this is a silly question who would say failing?

Not many would say failing, but I think we tend to act like it a lot more.

Yeah. I'm afraid to do lots of things.

"If life is so short, why do we do so many things we don’t like and like so many things we don’t do?"
The same kind of goes for that third question too.

That is life.Sad but true.

"When it’s all said and done, will you have said more than you’ve done?"
The first four are sort of the same style.
haha

I think you will do more than you've said. And I think you will push me to do the same

I hope so.

"What is the one thing you’d most like to change about the world?"
That's a tough one.

That is tough. There is a lot of things that need a changin'.WORLD PEACE FOR ALL!What about you?

I want everyone to have someone who loves them... and know that.

Aww. That is sweet.I love it.I change my answer to that.

haha
Okay.
Speaking of which, maybe that's also why I like the idea of adoption so much. It kind of answers that in a practical way.
It does.That is what came to mind when you said it.It is beautiful.
You know what else is beautiful?

What?

The smell of fresh donuts wafting upstairs right now.
And you.

Haha.You tricked me.
I thought you were going to say me but you said donuts and then me

haha

Yeah.
Ok. Lets continue

"If happiness was the national currency, what kind of work would make you rich?"

"Are you doing what you believe in, or are you settling for what you are doing?"

Wait.We didn't answer!LOL

Oh, right.
hahahaha

I don't really get the question

What kind of work would make you happiest?

Being a wife and mother. Does that count/?

Sure.

What is your answer?

I like to teach people things that actually make a difference in their lives... or get people to do or try meaningful things that might have otherwise scared them.
So that could be anything from teaching my brother to read to helping someone take the first steps to moving abroad for the first time.

I feel lke you are beating me at these questions. Your answers are so much better.

What is that occupation called? I don't know. Teacher is what I've come up with for now.
Want to know a secret?

(I was also signing up for health insurance but now I'm done. 100% attention starting now)Yes.

hahaha
I've done this list before.
And I'm naturally the kind of person who tends to think about these kinds of things a lot.

What? really?
haha
You didn't even know what this list was

It's been years, but yeah.
Back in '06, '07, and '08, I got really into these kinds of self-help type blogs.

Do you still want to do it?

Marc and Angel's has been around for a while.
haha
Of course.
It's not like I'm consulting my premade list somewhere.
I just mentioned it because I have thought about these questions before.

Ok. Next question.

"Are you doing what you believe in, or are you settling for what you are doing?"

Being a hair stylist isn't really what I wanted to be when "I grew up" but I'm glad my path led to this. I love the feeling of making people feel wonderful about themselves.So, yes.

Sometimes too, you settle for what you're doing in order to get to do what you believe in... the important part, I think, is that you make sure that the "in order to" part really is in order to...

"If the average human life span was 40 years, how would you live your life differently?"

I'd have as many babies as I could really young so I could love on all of them so much more.You?

I try to live as though I'll die when I'm 30. That way, everything else is a bonus.
Right now, if I knew I'd die at 40, I wouldn't change anything about how I'm living right now... 'cept maybe save less for "after 40" retirement.
This is one where your answer feels much better than mine.

You can't always win.

"To what degree have you actually controlled the course your life has taken?"

I feel like I've had zero control.

Yeah?

But then again I've done everything to make my life go this way.It is a trick question

Ha.
It sort of is.
I guess there are some things that could be outside your control or your own positioning... like your parents moved a lot as a kid, your husband moved you and your family, etc.
When you say you've had zero control and that you've done everything to make you life go this way, is that a negative thing?

It could be

"Are you more worried about doing things right, or doing the right things?"

Doing the right things.

Me too.

The Letter E

Just so happens the day after I started my 101 Goals I started on a goal. I watched a movie and that goes with Watch 26 movies one for each letter of the alphabet goal. Its title happens to start with E, which I thought was going to be a rather hard letter to find to watch. This was just too easy. I like how this challenge is going already.

Elysium

"In the year 2154, two classes of people exist: the very wealthy, who live on a pristine man-made space station called Elysium, and the rest, who live on an overpopulated, ruined Earth." - Taken from IMDB

I'm not a movie critic. No review here.

Movies like this make think of the future. Could this stuff really happen? If it did I wonder what I would do. Would I be among the lucky people who live in Elysium or would I be the regular joe's living on Earth? No matter which one I was I know I would be part of the revolution. 

Bring it on, future world. Bring it on.

101 Goals In 1001 Days

Start date: December 22, 2013
End date: September 18, 2016

Goals Completed: 39/101

Save $11 for every completed goal (109/1111)
Go 1 month without buying any unnecessary items (0/30)
Get emergency fund to goal
Add $10 extra dollars for everything month in Gage's savings for a year ($120 extra) 2/12
Shop with coupons for a month
Use credit card in emergencies only
Make a budget and stick to it for 3 months (0/3)
Don't buy lunch at work for 1 month (3/30)

Wear a dress every day for 2 weeks (14/14)
Organize clothes
Get rid of everything I really won't wear (Completed 2/21/13)
Wear an outfit that is completely one color(monotone)
Keep my toes 'done' for one summer
Buy a wedding dress

Cook 10 dinner meals on my own(10/10) 
Bake 10 desserts on my own(2/10) Chocolate chip cookies from scratch on 1/10/13, brownies
Open a cookbook to a random page and make whatever comes up
Make/Eat a pie on Pi day
Build a bonfire and toast marshmallows (camping 5-23-15)
cook My Love his favorite meal
create a recipe book

See all of Audrey Hepburn movies (The Unforgiven)
See all Marilyn Monroe Movies (How To Marry A Millionaire, Monkey Business, River Of No Return)
Read my height in books
Make a playlist of 101 of my favorite songs
See 10 concerts/shows (2/10) Emancipator Ensemble, The Hold Steady
Watch 26 movies one for each letter of the alphabet (19/26) Admission, The Book Thief, Croods, Devil's Pass, Elysium,Flowers In The Attic, How To Marry A Millionaire, In Her Skin, Killing Season, Lawless, Monkey Business,Overnight, Paradise, River Of No Return, The Spectacular Now,Toad Road, Underdog: The Julian Assange Story, Would You Rather
Attend a play/ballet/performance

Go ziplining
Go on a bi-plane
Go snowboarding/skiing
Ride a horse
Visit Mammoth Cave
Stay in the Wigwam camp
Visit all the distilleries on Bourbon Trail
Get a passport
Go to a church
Go ice skating
Visit 5 musuems(4/5) Frazier History Musuem(2/17) (Cincinatti Tri Musuems)
Throw a dart at a map and go where it lands
Go to the Kentucky Derby/Oaks Day
Travel to a foreign country
Disney World Gage went on Spring Break with Papa!
Have a girls weekend
Go on a romantic getaway with My Love
Go on a family walk 5 times(5/5) 

Complete a 365 day photo challenge
Use your DSLR at least once a week in a month
Take 100 polaroids
Take a picture of each letter of the alphabet
Take a picture of the same place every month for a year and then turn it into a calendar(Have to start by Sept 2015)
Sell a photograph
Photograph a sunrise
Take photobooth pictures

Write a list of inspirational things, one thing for each letter of the alphabet
Write my name in the sand
Start a pressed flowers notebook
Tie a secret to a balloon and let it go
Write a poem(5) 5/5
Leave a note inside a book for someone to find
Send a message in a bottle
Make a photo album of me and my love Wedding Album
Learn calligraphy
Finish the 642 book
Send a post card MY WEDDING INVITATIONS!
Answer the '50 questions that will free your mind' (50/50)
Carve my name in a tree
Put 5 surprise notes in Gage's lunch(0/5)

Leave a 100% tip
Pay for someone else's food behind me in the drive-thru
Compliment someone everyday for a week
Plant a tree on Earth Day
Send a note of appreciation
Leave quarters on candy machines
Do something special for my love he would appreciate
Participate in the Angel Tree
Buy a small gift for someone just because
Contribute to someone else's charity of choice
Give away a free haircut
Send anonymous flowers to someone

Buy a magic 8 ball and base all my decisions on it for a week
Have family game night
Find my signature cocktail
Make a stepping stone
Build a blanket fort and sleep in it
Participate in a 5k
Get a library card
Get a hour long massage
Go to a hookah bar
Have a family dinner at a table
Fill the house with at least 10 pictures of family
Learn to play chess
Create and celebrate our own family holiday
Take a class
Quit smoking
Achieve my personal weight goal 
Kiss in the rain
Read a book with my love
Join/create a book club
Work out for 30 days straight(0/30)
Try 3 new types of tea (2/3) (Monkey Picked Oolong) (black tea)

Change

When I was growing up my life was all about changes. Changing locations, changing schools,and changing friends. Nothing ever stayed the same for long. That was my life and I never knew any different. That was until I got a taste of the other side. Not changing.

Of course, I didn't get to know how that felt until I was an adult but it felt great. I liked the stability. I liked having the comfort of knowing that this is the way it was day in and day out. I guess that might seem boring but when you grew up the way I did it was more a blessing than anything.

Now, I might could say I have a wee problem with ANY change at all. Cutting my hair off? So scary! Buying a new car? Worry, anxiety, eek! Changing jobs or even my schedule at my job? Don't even go there! I mean anything and my brain goes into stress mode over change!

Why is that? Change can be a wonderful thing. I just need to learn to let go and embrace it like I did when I was just a child.

Oh, to be a child again.

My Poem About Being Sick

I'm a big baby when I'm sick.

but I have no one to baby me.

Someone get me some soup.

Please, just a little soup

for my soul

and my nose.

The end.

Paring Down

I was doing a little browsing on my favorite clothing websites. It is what I do when I'm bored. Most of these have wishlists on the page and I just fill em' up. Some I will eventually buy and some I won't.

I actually don't need to buy anything but that is my thing. I like clothes. I am clothes horse.

It dawned me that I actually have way more clothes than I need. Some still have tags on them. Some of been hanging around for awhile. Kind of sad life these clothes are living. Dontcha, think? Beautiful clothes that need to be worn but they aren't.

I think I have decided that for the next 30 I am going to embark a little project. I'm going to attempt to wear a new outfit every day. No repeats. I think this will help show me what I skip over and possibly what I need to sell/give away.

A few exceptions will be made.

1. Jeans/pants - I don't have 30 days worth of pants. I will have to repeat these.
2. Off season clothing - I can't obviously wear my sweaters and jackets in 80 degree weather.
3. If I wear something that can be used for a totally new look. Just as long as it isn't the same outfit.

This should be interesting. I think it is going to be hard not to reach for my favorites. Maybe I will find new ways to wear them. Maybe I will rediscover some long lost pieces.

We will see.

Speaking Of Braids

A Confession From A Hair Stylist

I am a hair stylist.

When that sentence escapes my mouth people automatically assume I live and breathe hair. I do love doing hair and I do spend a fair amount of my 'free' time reading/looking up things about hair. After all, it is my profession of choice. Living and breathing it? So far from the truth.

I don't actually want to stay late at work doing someones hair. I've been there 10 hours. We are closed. Get out. I don't want to do your hair on my day off. I don't care if you are paying me or not. I definitely don't want to do your hair if you are wanting it done for free. Of course, there are exceptions to those rules. Family, another hair stylist, or a cute guy. I'm game. Lets do it.

I don't know everything there is to know about hair. Wait, what? Yes, that is right. I'm not a walking hair encyclopedia. I don't know why your hair is thinning out. I don't know why your hair grows uneven. I don't know why your friends brothers sister mother hair won't grow. I just don't know.

I also don't know how to do everything involving hair. Sure, I can learn these things and most of the time I do. Ask me to french braid your hair down the middle and I might laugh in your face. Ask me to start your french braid on the side of your head and I'm your girl! See? Not a hair wizard.

Sometimes I really just want to tell people these things but I can't. They don't mean anything by it. They probably have no idea. Smile and move on.

If it isn't obvious I have had a long day at work.
I'll be feeling hair-tastic tomorrow.
Sometimes you just run low on faith and gasoline.

5 Ways To Help Yourself Have A Good Day

1. Wake up! - How simple is that! Can you imagine how sad the day would be if you didn't wake up!

2. Breathe - Sometimes when the day is getting to me I just stop for a moment and breathe. Sometimes that moment even happens before I even leave my bed.

3. Smile - I really think if you just keep a smile on your face your whole day will be filled with smiles. Your mood will better and the people you encounter will have better moods, too.

4. Be kind - Something as simple as opening a door for someone will make you feel all nice inside.

5. Do less - Now I could just be lazy but when I feel like I'm overloaded I just make a list of what is important today and what can wait until tomorrow. I feel a lot better when I'm not overwhelmed.

It is a pretty generic list but it does the job. Maybe I will make a list of the specific things that make me have a better day.

Eye Took It Off

I was pretty reluctant to wear make-up when I was a teenager. My best friend likes to joke that she practically had to hold me down to get me to wear it. Once I was off and running with it I don't know if there were many days where I didn't wear make-up. I have never worn a lot of make-up. It all looks fairly natural minus the eyeliner. I have been an eyeliner lover and wearer since the beginning of my make-up time.

I felt weird without eyeliner on. I didn't feel like me. To even drive the point home when I did brave the world without my usual eyeliner I would get told that I "looked funny" and people would ask me if I was tired or sick. I think that if anything at all had more to do with never leaving the house without a full face on. I wanted people to think I was pretty and I felt like without my eyeliner I would never achieve that.

I've had a lot of things happen recently in my life that has just left me drained. To the point that I rarely want to get out of my PJ's let alone put on my trusty eyeliner and other make-up. Don't worry about me, though. I'm a trooper. Anyway, that has left me with another problem. Facing the world without make-up or rather without as much make-up. Honestly, I'm not ready go all the way. I'm not that brave...yet.

So, I went a week without my eyeliner. I went out of state. I saw family. I saw friends. I went to work. I went to doctor appointments. I went to my child's school. I went shopping. I have done everything I normally do and I have done it fine. I lived. I made it through. I didn't die because I didn't have my eyeliner on. I got complimented. I got insulted. It was a pretty scary adventure. Don't even think for a second this is a silly matter.

This isn't a post about caring about what people think about me. This isn't a post about how awful I think make-up is now.

It is just about me being comfortable with me.

A Project In The Making

My grandmother passed away on April 20th. Just last week. Doesn't really seem all that real even after the celebration of life service. My heart is hurting as is everyone else's heart in my family. She was a pretty amazing woman and really passionate about cooking. You would never leave her house with your tummy not full. That is even if she knew you or not. Her kitchen was always open.

When I was staying at her house for her service this week I was in her kitchen quite a bit putting out food for all of the people stopping by and family visiting. I was surrounded by her recipes. Her wonderful amazing recipes that I have warmed my heart and belly since I was just a baby.

I gathered all of the recipes that she had written and made copies of them late one night. What better way to remember my grandmother always then with her own handwriting and her own recipes.

Now what to do with them is the question. I'm thinking a beautiful scrapbook will do them justice.

That is my project in the making

April Flowers

I like putting flowers in my vintage Coke bottles.

Recycle, reduce, reuse.

The Bull

After another long day dealing with...well, life. I sat down and started watching television just to get my mind off of everything. I find that junk TV sure is a great medicine if you want to just stop thinking about what the day brought to the table. But even a television show can deliver quite a punch.

The show was about a failing business. The owner needed help and basically someone was brought in to help him. She brought him somewhere where there was a mechanical bull. He tried to ride and fell off. He tried again and rode it for a little longer before falling off again.

It is a pretty straight forward lesson. When life throws you on the ground, pick yourself up and keep on trying. This message can be taught with a bull, lemons, a horse or whatever. Even though it is a 'duh' message it was definitely something I needed to hear right now.

These last couple months have been trying at best.

So, here I am looking right and that bull and saying 'bring it'.

blog  

/blôg/

Noun A Web site on which an individual or group of users record opinions, information, etc. on a regular basis.

Verb Add new material to or regularly update a blog. -------------- I've always had a blog/journal online since I was about fourteen years old. The last two years without one felt strange. When I need a place to vent or rave I had no where to go. I need that place. My only little place on the web. Here I am. I don't know about this "on a regular basis" business but I will give it a shot. Who knows.